A Joke Too Far
by TheKidWithNoLife
Summary: The Maruaders' are up to their usual tricks, but this time one has gone too far. Severus is out for revenge, and Lily is watching.
1. Chapter 1

The four Marauders sat by their usual hangout near under an ordinary muggle tree but was still overlooked the Whomping Willow. They had just began their final year at Hogwarts. They could be sitting in the library working hard as the other seventh years were expected to do, instead they were sitting outside comparing height. Sirius, with the flowing black hair and serious jaw line, was the tallest. James, the messy-haired boy with spectacles and a dreadful uniform was next but only by a centimetre or so. Remus was then slightly shorter with his strawberry-blonde hair that was neatly combed that matched his perfect uniform. Then there was Peter. Peter was the smallest by about a foot so he didn't even bother to stand next to the others while they debated height.. He had greasy, long hair that was uncared for and his uniform was the same. While Sirius and James pretended like they didn't care, they still made sure to wash frequently. Peter on the other hand would wash his face every morning before spraying his week-old uniform in pretentious spray. No one said anything though, mostly because Peter didn't talk to many people outside of the Marauders. And the Marauders didn't say anything because they never noticed it. They weren't the most observable people at Hogwarts.

"Snivellus incoming." Peter said.

"What's that?" James said as he and Sirius continued to stare each other down to decide who that tallest was.

"Snivellus." Peter repeated. James and Sirius broke away and looked at the fuming Severus Snape storming towards them.

"Potter!" Severus shouted, drawing his wand.

"Severus!" Lily shouted as she ran at full speed towards them. She had been standing by the lake with some of her friends when she had just, by chance, turned to see Severus march towards them. Lily continued to shout his name while she ran the distance.

"I'm Head Boy, now." James said, standing tall. Severus stood at the same level as James and the two boys were about the same height, although James' confidence made Severus feel small.

"He's Head Boy now, Snivellus." Sirius said with a crooked smile. "That means we're untouchable. Better run off now, you see."

"Potter-" Lily breathed as she finally reached them. Severus lowered his wand.

"Evans." James bowed his head slightly.

"What's going on here, boys?" Lily asked. Lily was Head Girl and was one of the few people, apart from teachers, who still had any power over James.

"Potter here was just about to get his butt kicked." Severus spat.

"Calm down, you might hurt yourself." James mocked.

"Potter-" Lily started.

"I know, I've been naughty." James raised his eyebrow at Lily. "Do you need to punish me?"

"Back off, James." Severus said, stepping between James and Lily.

"I was just kidding. Evans' knows that." James said quickly. "How about you go, Severus, before you do something you'll regret."

"Yeah, get lost, Snivellus." Sirius backed him up.

"No!" Severus shouted as he raised his wand again. He didn't need to say 'sectumsempra' as he was already well-practiced so that he still hit James directly at full force. It deeply gashed James' face and chest and with a cry the young Marauder fell to the ground with one last look at Lily.

"No!" Sirius screamed. Sirius and Remus immediately fell to the ground to their best friends' aid while Peter raised his wand, aiming it at Severus.

"Potter!" Lily screamed, pushing past Severus and kneeling beside Sirius and Remus. The force of Lily pushing past him had made Severus fall to his knees but he had quickly pulled himself up.

"What'd I do?" James asked, weakly grabbing Sirius' arm.

"You did nothing- you did- you did nothing." Sirius said frantically. "Lily- have you got him?"

"Yes-" Lily said. She had ripped open James' shirt to look at the cuts in more detail. They were fatally deep. There was blood everywhere.

Sirius stood to his full height and walked towards Severus and Peter.

"Peter, I need you to go and get Madame Pomfrey. Quickly." Sirius ordered before turning to Severus. "You better hope he lives!"

"I hope he dies-"

"I did it!" Sirius spat in Severus' face. "I pranked you, so what? You decide to try kill my best friend because of a little prank that he had nothing to do with?"

"I didn't-" Severus tried to defend himself but then swallowed. "You've both tortured me! What did I ever do to you?"

"Sirius!" Sirius turned to see Lily, beckoning him closer.

"He'll be okay?" Sirius asked. Lily shook her head. Remus sat motionless, staring down at James' face. Lily held James' hand tightly. She had tried as many spells as she could but nothing was working well enough. Every spell she tried was sloppy because she was emotional. Sirius sat down beside his best friend and held his other hand. By now Peter was long gone and was already in the castle even though it had taken Lily almost twice as long to cover that distance, nothing was going to stop Peter from getting James help.

"I'm here, James." Sirius said softly and then tried to lighten the mood. "I'm still taller."

"Bastard." James tried to laugh but ended up rolling onto his side whilst coughing up blood.

"You're going to Azkaban." Remus said softly to Severus. In response, Severus took several steps back before falling back to his knees, finally realising what he had done.

"I need you to tell Lily something, Sirius." James said, struggling. "Tell her I'm-"

"I know," Lily said, rolling him back onto his back. She had manged to heal half of the gashes but he was still bleeding out at an alarming rate. Remus had also tried to heal him earlier but nothing had worked. It was useless.

"I'm so sorry." James whimpered before rolling on his side to cough up more blood. James had managed to try keep his cool for as long as he could but he had now resorted into a red-faced, runny nosed, crying child. Although his nose was running with blood rather than the alternative. Tears streamed down his face and his cheeks burned.

"I'm so sorry." James repeated, crying hysterically.

"No- I'm so sorry." Sirius said, now crying equally as hard as James was.

"Sirius!" Everyone turned to see Peter running back as quickly as he could but it was quite a distance. Closely behind him was Madame Pomfrey who had kicked up her speed and overtook Peter when she saw the crowd of people surrounded the almost-motionless James lying on the ground.

"Hold on, Prongs." Remus said, finally snapping out of it and returning to James' side.

"Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs." James said, forcing a weak smile, before closing his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

The Marauders and Lily sat by James' bedside continuously until he woke. Sometimes this would only be for a few seconds before falling back asleep and it wasn't for almost a week that he had woken up fully. There were many other visitors for James, but the Marauders and Lily were the only consistent ones. There was always someone with James around the clock- Sirius made sure of it. Both Sirius and Lily had spent every night in the seat beside James. Although they all had busy schedules with lessons and an ungodly amount of homework, they all made time so that someone was always there. Both Remus and Peter had spent a serious amount of time by James' side but neither of them stayed by his side as much as Sirius or Lily. Sirius was basically James' brother, and while Lily hated to admit it, James was her first love. Her only love.

"Padfoot?" James said as he awakened from his slumber.

"Prongs." Sirius said with a warm smiling, expecting James to lie back and fall asleep as he had every other time he had awoken. This time was different. James was awake.

"Evans?" James said, trying to sit up to a more flattering position as he was well aware that he was most-likely sporting a double chin in Lily's direction.

"Potter." Lily said, returning to her usual tone around James that she always put on. Bored, unimpressed, tired. Sirius looked up at Lily, confused for a moment and then realising what she was doing. She had spent the last six days talking and listening about James, always referring to him as 'James' while he was asleep.

"Where am I?" James asked.

"Hospital wing, mate." Sirius put a hand on her friends' shoulder.

"Quidditch accident?" James asked. Sirius shook his head. "Then what?"

"Snivellus."

"Severus." James corrected him, knowing full well that calling Severus 'Snivellus' would get him no farther with Lily. "But what'd he do, poison my goblet?"

"Er, no." Sirius said uncomfortably, not wanting to tell his best friend that he had the equivalent of two dozen swords beat across his chest. And that it was Sirius' fault.

"What aren't you telling me?" James asked and as he finally sat up fully felt the force of the gashes across his chest and abdomen and fell back onto the bed in a huff. Sirius sat back in his chair, contemplating what to say next. Lily rushed back to his side and dabbed his forehead with a damp towel as Madame Pomfrey had shown her and Sirius to do since they were already there all the time.

"You've been unconscious for six days." Lily changed the subject. "You lost a lot of blood. Even Madame Pomfrey struggled, and that's saying something."

"Remind me to send her a fruit basket." James ran a hand through his hair. It hadn't been washed properly in days and felt uncomfortably greasy. This only made James feel more uncomfortable with Lily sitting so close as he could also smell the distinct odour of teenage boy BO.

"Sirius, I brought you-" Remus said as he saw James wide-eyed and awake. Remus had just entered the Hospital Wing followed closely by Peter and Professor McGonagall.

"It's good to see you moving, Potter." Professor McGonagall said in her comforting Scottish accent.

"It's good to see you too, Professor." James smiled warmly before turning back to Sirius. "So what happened?"

"That's what I would like to know, as well." Professor McGonagall raised her eyebrow at Sirius.

"He just fell, Professor." Remus said softly, staring at Sirius.

"He just fell… what, a dozen times?" McGonagall said in a disapproving tone. "You'd think the Whomping Willow had you for breakfast, Potter."

"No, Professor, they're right." Potter followed their lead. "I just fell. You know me, dramatic."

"Last time I checked, Black was the dramatic character of your group."

"And don't you forget it, Professor." Sirius winked at Professor McGonagall. In return, she rolled her eyes before sauntering off out of the Hospital Wing.

"I didn't fall." James said quietly, aware that they were alone.

"I asked them not to rat out Severus." Lily said quickly before Sirius could start. "And if we ratted out Severus, Severus would rat out Sirius."

"Why would Severus rat out Sirius? What'd you do?" James asked.

"You know that thing we were talking about- enchanting his pillow to-" Sirius lowered his voice and James patted him on the arm to quieten him. The last thing he wanted was Lily to hear about some of the cruel pranks that they had planned against her friend Severus.

"Did it work?" James asked Sirius quietly.

"Yeah!" Sirius grinned like a happy child for a moment before returning to his usual serious face that he had designed to make him look more dramatic. "I am really, so sorry. I didn't know-"

"It's okay, Padfoot."

"What are up with these nicknames?" Lily finally broke her silence. "Do you have messed up feet, Sirius?"

"Excuse you." Sirius said before breaking into his usual grin that he saved for his friends. "My feet are just darling, I don't know what you're on about."

"Evans, can you get me a glass of water?" James changed the subject. Lily stood up obediently and left for a moment. "I love you guys but this is my chance. Come back in an hour, okay?"

"But-" Peter started but Remus pinched his arm when Lily returned with the glass of water.

"You know what? We have a load of work to do." Remus forced. "So if you're okay here James-"

"Yeah. Okay." James cut him off, trying to sound disappointed. "Bye guys."

They all waved goodbye and left James and Lily alone together. When Lily wasn't looked, Sirius gave James a big thumbs up.


	3. Chapter 3

James took the rag from Lily and ran it through his hair, hoping that it would at least make his hair look less disgusting but it had quite the opposite affect, making it look almost as greasy as Severus' hair.

"I'm glad you're awake, Potter." Lily said after a moment of watching James try to casually clean himself up with visibly failing.

"I know Evans, the world would just go dark without the amazing James Potter." James joked.

"Don't joke about that." Lily playfully punched him on the shoulder, careful not to cause him any more harm.

"What was it anyway?" James asked.

"Well, you see-"

"I know he did it." James cut her short. "It was a strong spell. You don't get this sort of contact from _expecto patronum,_ do you?"

"I wouldn't know, he didn't cast it verbally. It's nothing I've ever encountered before, though." Lily said, looking down at James' body where, a week earlier, was bleeding profusely and she was dreading the idea of living in a world without James' smile. _Damn, he's right._ Lily thought to herself. If she'd lost James, she would not know what to do with herself.

"You must admit, it was impressive." James said, admiringly.

"James-" Lily started, but James cut her off.

"You should ask him, hypothetically, of course." James assured her. "I'm not out for revenge."

"Well, there's a first for everything." Lily forced a smile.

"I'm getting sick of this, Evans." James dulled the mood.

"Sick of it?" Lily questioned.

"The pranks. They've escalated too much. They were once a bit of fun, and Severus can't deny he's had some fun over the years getting us back. It's gone too far, now. It was never meant to be attempted murder, Evans."

"I don't think he was trying to kill you, Potter."

"Yeah? Well, tell that to the stab wounds in my chest." James said, starting to feel angry that Lily could possibly try and defend Severus. "He's your friend, why don't you go and tell him it's all over. He doesn't need to worry about us anymore. We won't bother him. I can promise you that."

"I'm not telling him anything, he's not my friend." Lily said coldly, brushing him off as if he was a bug on her robes. "He hasn't got any."

"What happened?" James asked, trying to lean forward as he was interested but regretted it almost immediately as the feeling of a dozen swords being pushed into his torso returned, knocking the wind out of him. It was difficult being bedridden. Madam Pomfrey was doing her best, but there was only so much she could do.

"He hurt you." Lily said softly but then cleared her throat and returned to her usual tone. "And if you die then Dumbledore will assign a new Head Boy, someone worse. And no offence, but I don't trust people like Peter."

"What's wrong with Peter? He's my best friend." James said, shocked. "I'd trust him with my life."

"I'm sorry I brought it up then." Lily said.

"He's a good guy, Evans." James continued. "I don't just let any random person in my life. I assure you, I keep only the best."

"I'm in your life." Lily reminded him.

"Oh," James blushed. "Well, the best _and you_ , then."

"Good save," Lily laughed, which then made James laugh.

"Look, I trust Peter." James added.

"I guess that if you trust him, I trust him." Lily said through forced teeth, hiding behind a smile.

"Did I at least look good when Severus did me in?" James asked, with a grin still on his face.

"Good?" Lily said, her smile faltering. "You were covered in blood and crying."

"Oh," James' heart skipped a beat. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay," Lily put a hand on his hand. "I'm just glad you're alive, James."

James' eyes sprung open in genuine shock. He had no conscious memory of Lily ever calling him James. It was almost always Potter, or whatever name she'd call him for pulling particularly mean pranks on Severus when they were good friends. This changed everything.

James gripped Lily's hand a smiled up at her as she grinned back at him. With her spare hand, she brushed his greasy fringe out of his eyes.

"I think the first thing I'm going to do is get a haircut as soon as I'm out of here." James announced.

"And here I was thinking that the first thing you would do is bathe." Lily teased.

"Lower your exceptions, Evans."

 _Don't worry, I already have._ Lily wanted to say to him but he had yawned and leaned back into his pillow, snuggling down so that he was comfortable. Lily knew this meant that it was time for James' afternoon nap. While he was always full of energy, whatever Madam Pomfrey had him on was making him tired.

 _Is tiredness is a symptom of his treatment or if she is trying to subdue him before he starts pranking the ward?_ Lily thought to herself, internally laughing at the idea of James pulling pranks in the Hospital Wing.

"I'll come back tomorrow." Lily told him. "Rest and feel better. There's a quidditch game coming up soon and McGonagall's going to make sure your in the arena even if she has to drag you there herself."

"I wouldn't even be surprised." James said softly, falling asleep on the last syllable.

Lily looked at his face. _How could such a peaceful face be such a mischievous devil in his undrugged consciousness?_ Lily kept her eyes on his face. It was a lot rougher than it usually was, as well as greasier but it was also softer, as if he had suddenly matured overnight.


	4. Chapter 4

Madam Pomfrey wouldn't allow James to leave the Hospital Wing for several days. While everyone wanted to see James get better, all the other seventh years were busy working while James was resting. Madam Pomfrey had tended to his wounds, although the spell was curious and blunt, undefined almost, and were difficult to heal in a single wave of the wand. McGonagall had visited daily to make sure he was caught up on his classes although she was worried about him, even though she wouldn't say it outright. She wasn't meant to show favouritism, but James was certainly one of her favourites. Her was smart, charismatic, and always with his cheery smile.

"Mr. Potter, how are you feeling today?" McGonagall said as she swept into the room. She knew how to make an entrance, and she certainly owned the room when she entered. Every step was unwavering power, but every smile was genuine friendship. Somehow the room even seemed brighter as he entered. It was no longer the grim Hospital Wing but now it shared similarities with the Gryffindor common room.

"Professor, what a sight for sore eyes!" James exclaimed in her general direction, squinting with difficulty.

"You could probably see me better if you put your glasses on." McGonagall said.

"You'd think that a school full of wizards and someone would have fixed my eyes by now." James laughed. "Evans took my glasses, said they needed a deep clean after years of abuse. I wouldn't know about that but I wouldn't say no to someone cleaning them for me."

"The eyes are a very delicate thing, Mr. Potter." Professor McGonagall said casually, but everything that came out of her mouth came across as wise.

"They're the doorway into the soul, am I correct, Professor?"

"You are."

"Then what does it say about me then? Being essentially blind without them as my eyes don't work as well as everyone else. Does it mean my soul is not as good as everyone else?."

"You always ask the best questions, Potter." McGonagall said, taking off her own glasses and cleaning them delicately with the sleeve of her cloak. "I had once asked a man, wiser than anyone I had ever met, in my youth as well. I quite enjoyed his response."

"Professor, the suspense is killing me." James laughed, notioning as McGonagall had been taking her time as she spoke. Every word held his attention, that's what McGonagall was like. She was his favourite professor.

"Sometimes we don't always see what is in front of us without a little help. It's not because we are damaged, but because we are stubborn!" McGonagall laughed low, returning to the memory a long time ago when she was told it.

"I don't think I understand, professor. I need help seeing what's in front of me? I don't understand." James questioned, suddenly serious.

"How is Ms Evans?" McGonagall asked with a sly smile and a wink. Suddenly James realised immediately what she had meant as more pieces of the puzzle began to fit together.

"She's cleaning my glasses." James reminded her, trying to play dumb to avoid an uncomfortable conversation. It was the equivalent to talking about girls to his mother, and that was something James did not intend to do.

"Quidditch." McGonagall changed the subject as she sensed his unwillingness to continue. Although it did somewhat surprise him that she had lasted so long before asking him about Quidditch. She was always striving to win, but her main goal but to just demolish Slytherin.

"When's the next game, Professor?" James asked.

"This Saturday."

"What day is it today?"

"Tuesday."

"The days in here are just getting muddled. You know what is needed in here, Professor? Natural sunlight. I can never tell what time or day it is in here."

"I'll be sure to inform Madam Pomfrey." McGonagall laughed.

"Do you reckon Saturday is a bit soon for me to be on a broom?" James asked. He was Head Boy and it would be bad if he was not at events like Quidditch, especially as apparently most of their year group was worried about him and always pestering the Marauders and Lily about what was happening.

"The team needs their star chaser, but then again we don't want you getting hurt anymore." McGonagall said, rubbing her chin. "We'll see what happens."

"Your presence is enough for me, Professor." James jokingly flirted.

"It was good to see you, Mr. Potter." McGonagall said softly, beginning to take her leave. "I do hope to have you back in my lessons again soon. I must admit, it is not as interesting without the fourth Marauder- although Peter is trying."

"Marauder?" James asked curiously, pretending not to know the meaning.

"My mistake." McGonagall winked at James again before sweeping out of the room as gracefully as she had entered. The room returned to being just an ordinary Hospital Wing without her. Filled with sick and semi-broken teenage wizards, like him, hoping that Madam Pomfrey can fix them.


	5. Chapter 5

James suspected that Professor McGonagall had somewhat threatened Madam Pomfrey as over the next few days she had been spending a considerable amount of time at his bedside. She did everything with a stern face, suggesting that McGonagall had been persistant and that the extra attention was not something Madam Pomfrey had been intending to do.

"Drink." Madam Pomfrey said bluntly, pulling James by the fabric on his shoulder so that he was sitting in an upright position. James groaned but he was certainly feeling better, and although he didn't like to admit it, he did appreciate the attention. McGonagall had told the marauders and Lily that they had to start prioritising their school work now that they knew James was going to be perfectly fine. To reinforce this, she had ordered Pomfrey to only allow them fifteen minutes a day in the Hospital Wing and they were not allowed in after their evening meal in the great hall.

"I tried persuading Pomfrey for an extra few minutes to talk about Head-Boy-Head-Girl stuff but she didn't go for it." Lily explained. Fourteen minutes had passed into their session and Madam Pomfrey had made eye contact with Lily and tapped her wrist.

"Thanks for trying." James said, feeling pressured for time.

"How're you feeling? Do you reckon that you could play Quidditch on Saturday?" Lily asked.

"I'm feeling a lot better." James said. "Pomfrey will probably try convince McGonagall otherwise but I think I could do it."

"If you think so then I can talk to McGonagall. She'll probably give us more time if you can beat the match against Ravenclaw. She'd probably admit all of us into the Wing if you promised to beat Slytherin."

"Maybe next time." James said and lowered his voice as Madam Pomfrey started to walk towards them. "Tell McGonagall she can count on me."

"Okay, bye!" Lily said as Madam Pomfrey stood beside her with her arms crossed.

"See you round, Evans." James waved her out.

"Are we expecting anymore of your little friends to stop by tonight?" Madam Pomfrey asked.

"No, I think that's everyone for tonight." James said softly. Each of his friends had only fifteen minutes which was so that they could spend more of their time studying rather than chatting. The marauders, Lily, the Quidditch team, and his other friends in his house and year group had also stopped by, but Remus had devised a schedule to maximise their time so that James was not alone for long.

"I don't appreciate my Hospital Wing being used as a common room, Potter." Pomfrey said softly, careful not to wake the young Gryffindor boy in the next bed. James doubted he would wake up anyways, he had not woken for any of his visitors. Although James did feel bad as the young boy had not had any visitors at all. The boy had been in the bed ever since James had woken up. To be honest, James could not remember ever seeing the young Gryffindor boy even though he had attempted to meet as many as he could and learn their names which was harder than it appeared. It had been something Lily had recommended he did but he had already planned on taking his role as Head-Boy seriously while still having fun.

"Sorry." James apologised to Madam Pomfrey for his friends continuously treking into the Hospital Wing.

"It's not your fault, Potter." Madam Pomfrey said calmly. "It's just that it's not fair on the other students."

"I understand," James said. "He hasn't had a single visitor."

"Antonio is a quiet boy." Madam Pomfrey said, looking at the sleeping boy in the next bed. "It's time for you to get some rest, Potter."

"Good night, Madam Pomfrey." James said.

* * *

James slept through the night and morning with ease. He was awoken after lunch by the sound of laughter. Madam Pomfrey was sat down and talking in hushed whispers to the boy in the next bed. He looked small to James, possibly in his first year. James was glad he had made friends so quickly in his first year, bonding to his marauders for life. James hadn't originally seen Evans until later into his first year, even though they were both in Gryffindor, they had different interested and ran with different groups. She was glad that she had met him though, and vice-versa for him.

"Miss Evans had came by earlier but you were asleep, Potter." Madam Pomfrey informed him before returning back to her conversation.

"James Potter." James introduced himself to the young boy as soon as Madam Pomfrey returned to handing out her healing drinks.

"Robin Lockwood." The boy introduced himself. "You're the Gryffindor chaser, and the Head-Boy, right?"

"That's right." James said proudly.

"That's really cool." Robin said enthusiastically. "Tell me more,"

"Ah, I'm not that interesting. I'm rather dull." James lied but leaned closer to Robin. "Tell me about yourself."

Robin looked at him in shock, confused why someone as popular as James Potter would want to hear about some random eleven year old. Robin briefly told James about his family before looking up to James to continue the conversation.

"Tell me about your older brother." James prompted. Robin raised an eyebrow, confused once again before going into more detail. The two boys continued talking for over an hour. James made sure that Robin felt important as well as cracking a few jokes to make the young boy laugh. James' heart broke slightly when he realised that for the entire time he had not mentioned any friends at any point.

"I don't have any friends." Robin said when James asked him about it.

"Well that's not true, Robin. You're my friend." James said with a kind smile.

"Really?" Robin said excitedly.

"And James isn't friends with just anyone." James turned to see that Lily had bunked off one of her lessons to talk.

"Really?" Robin repeated.

"Really." James shook the boys hand and Robin responded with a look that could not be descirbed as anything else but the thought that he may never wash that hand ever again.

"McGonagall has asked if you were well enough to meet her in her classroom at the end of lessons today." Lily passed on the message.

"You have private conversations with Professor McGonagall?" Robin asked, looking utterly baffled.

"I do."

"She's a legend!" Robin exclaimed. "She taught my parents and they both speak so highly about her."

"I'm not surprised, Professor McGonagall is a legend." James agreed with him. "Hey, Robin, meet Lily Evans."

"Head-Girl Lily Evans!" Robin said, absolutely starstruck.

"It's nice to meet you, Robin." Lily said formally, shaking his hand and confirming James' suspicions that he will never wash it again.

"But bunking off lessons, Miss Evans, that's not what I call Head-Girl material." James joked, winking at Robin.

"Professor McGonagall just sent me from our transfiguration lesson to pass on the message." Lily explained. "I have to go back to lessons now. It was nice to meet you Robin."

"You too." Robin beamed.


End file.
